How to Find Love Right Now, According to 9 Dating Coaches
Relationship experts advise going on dates that are more active, using the upside-down smiley-face emoji and not being afraid to make the first move.
In “How to Win a Man,” an essay published in 1903, Cosmopolitan magazine told its readers, “The clever girl does not scintillate with brilliant speeches, overshadowing those around her and making them uncomfortable by comparison.” In a 1958 article titled “129 Ways to Get a Husband,” McCall’s, a now-defunct women’s magazine, advised women to have their “car break down at strategic places” and “read the obituaries to find eligible widowers.” In the 2001 best seller “The Art of Seduction,” the author Robert Greene recommended that those seeking a romantic partner should “use the demonic power of words to sow confusion.”
For more modern and less demonic relationship advice, we asked some of today’s most prominent dating advisers about strategies for finding love in 2023.
Kimberly Moffit, relationship therapist
(TikTok: @ask_kimberly)
Before earning her doctoral degree in psychology, Dr. Moffit, 40, was a member of Untamed, an all-girl teen-pop trio based in Toronto. Now she merges her performance skills with clinical research for her 1.8 million followers on TikTok, where she posts videos like “4 Psychological Hacks to Seem More Attractive.”
“When I started on TikTok, I thought maybe people still want to know how to kiss,” Dr. Moffit said. “I made a video, ‘How to Give a Good Kiss.’ That one did really well. But what was more surprising was when I followed it up with ‘How to Give a Good Hug.’ That video went insanely viral.”
DATING DO: “Equip yourself with an arsenal of tools. Sometimes getting what we want doesn’t come naturally.”
DATING DON’T: “Put all your eggs in one basket.”
RED FLAG: “White lies.”
PICKUP LINE: “Go up to someone at a bookstore and ask if they know where a certain series is.”
FLIRTIEST EMOJI: “Upside-down smiley. It’s flirty because the person on the other end never knows what it means.”