How to get autumn body ready
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Loading... - Donghai Peng
- 02 Sep 2022
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Summer is over, but is your body ready for the drab misery of autumn? Get in shape with these tips.
Eat lots of pies
Your toned summer physique will be useless against the drizzly ravages of autumn. Quickly put on layers of insulating flab by scoffing too many pies, chips, and any other food liable to knacker your arteries. Don’t forget to cancel the gym membership you never use either. The money you save can be spent on doughnuts.
Avoid sunlight
Want to fit in with all the other miserable-looking alabaster f**kers drinking pumpkin spice lattes this autumn? Cultivate a suitably pale complexion even the most hardcore of goths would envy by avoiding any and all natural light. If your tan won’t fade in time, try dabbing some talcum powder over the bronzed areas. Read More...
