Know What To Look For: 13 Signs Your Dick's All Fucked Up
Having a fucked up dick can be a serious problem, but sometimes it’s hard to know what to look for. Here are 13 signs it’s definitely all fucked up.
1. Your piss comes out as bubbles.
Streams, drips, and drizzles are fine, but if your piss floats out in bubble form, your dick might be all fucked up.
2. It’s twirling around like a goddamned pinwheel.
As fun and thrilling as this is to see, it’s not something that dicks are supposed to do. The only time a dick should move on its own is when it’s becoming erect, and if it’s spinning and squirting every which way, that’s a clear sign that something is seriously fucked with it.
3. It’s an innie.
This is perfectly normal for belly buttons, but when it comes to dicks, it may be cause for concern. Consult with your doctor if this is something you’re experiencing.
4. It’s really bright gray.
Gray isn’t normally a color that’s blindingly bright. If this happens to your dick, you should probably call your urologist right away.
5. You’re able to wad it up into a ball like putty.
You might think that this is cool and badass, but any medical professional will tell you it’s actually pretty fucked up.
6. It’s a salamander.
Every dick is different. Some are long, some are angled, some have unusual discoloration, and that’s perfectly okay, as these are just harmless, superficial irregularities, no different than, say, having a crooked nose or big ears. However, if your dick is a salamander, you might not want to be so quick to dismiss it as a benign cosmetic quirk, because in some cases this can actually be indicative of a more serious problem—namely that your dick could be all fucked up. Read More…