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Local Man Still Going On About The Fucking Slap

Friends, co-workers, family members and passers-by have pleaded with Waterford man Eamon Booker to please, for the love of God, stop going on about Will Smith slapping Chris Rock at the Oscars.

“Have you seen this one, check it out,” said Booker today, showing off a new meme on his phone at lunch break to his co-workers who have already seen every meme, heard every joke, and wrung every ounce of fun out of the once-shocking incident at the Oscars almost three weeks ago.

“Do you wonder, really, was it all an act for something? I mean, look at the way Chris Rock reacts to the hit, don’t you think he would have moved his hands more?” he added, while talking to the lads in the pub who have all moved on from the incident, if in fact they ever really cared about it in the first place.

“I see they’re making Will Smith retire from the Academy, amazing they never did that with Roman Polanski,” he muttered during his sleep, his Will Smith-addled subconscious refusing to let go of the subject even during his slumber.

Booker has been given till the end of the week by his mates to ‘get it all out of his system’, after which time he will be forbidden from mentioning the slap, the slapper, the slappeee or any associated slap-based anecdotes, under threat of receiving a good slap for himself. Read More…

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