Seaside towns in winter: A visitor's guide to a bleak day out
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- 21 Feb 2023
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Fancy a trip to the seaside to blow the cobwebs away? Here are some tips for a cold and miserable day out:
Don’t leave too early
The weak winter sun won’t manage to illuminate the world properly until at least 10am, so there’s no point in leaving early. Don’t risk public transport as the train will most likely be cancelled and the bus routes have all been slashed. Driving is preferable, as parking spaces will be the only thing in plentiful supply during your visit.
Dress appropriately
Don’t bother harbouring any fantasies that the sun will be warm enough for you to sit on the beach for a while. It will be f**king freezing, blowing a gale and, even if the clouds do break long enough for you to stop and admire the view, a seagull will immediately shit on your head. Head-to-toe waterproofs are vital.
Do zero research
Don’t bother checking if any local attractions or amenities are open before you set off, or you won’t go. The water park is only open during August, the beach donkeys have got frostbite and the museum of local curiosities is now a McDonald’s. The only thing open is the amusement arcade, where you will feed 30 quids’ worth of 2ps into the coin pusher machine while quietly weeping. Read More…
