7 Tips For Dating A Japanese Person
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Loading... - Bagaskoro Irawan
- 15 Jun 2022
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Dating a Japanese person can bring sensitive situations. Whether it’s viewed around dating etiquette, manners, and activities; it’s safe to say that Japan possesses a unique dating culture. This dating culture must be kept in mind when dating a Japanese person to fully grasp expectations and understanding.
Make sure that everything goes smoothly on your date with your potential partner with these 7 Tips for avoiding awkwardness.
1. Don’t be late!
So you’re about to have your first date with your Japanese date, here’s the first tip, be punctual, secondly, be punctual.
If you’ve ever been to Japan, you’ll see that everything and everyone is bang on time.
The trains are never late, people get to work on time, the post arrives when it’s supposed to arrive (Crazy isn’t it? – or what we should expect -_-).
This behaviour stems from a Japanese mindset called “KIKUBARI” æ°—é…ã‚Š.
Directly translating to English is – Attentive,
but in real life, it plays out as – ‘Being aware of others’ or ‘Being mindful of things other than yourself’.
So, when dating a Japanese person, if you’re late… it may appear as if you don’t have respect for their time! Hima ga nai zou!
2. They’re not the Ambassador of Japan!
Do remember, that your dear date was born and raised in Japan but they don’t represent it.
Too often have we overheard westerners (and Easterners) on a date with a Japanese person and
question after question is related to Japan! – Give it a rest, they’re a person, not a Japan Encyclopedia!
Don’t get me wrong, it’s perfectly OK to have a healthy interest in your date’s culture and visa-versa. But, it’s about balance! Would you really be dating this person if they were not Japanese?
Dating a Japanese person shouldn’t just be about the fact that they are Japanese!
3. Find out their story! Any mutual interests?
Become aware of who you’re dating. They’re a person who has left their home country, travelled to the other side of the world to live or study in a foreign land, away from family, friends, and everything that they previously knew.
Isn’t that amazing? They’re an adventurer!
You could ask –
– Why did you decide to leave Japan?
– What did you choose to come here?
– How does it feel to have such a life-changing experience?.
I could go on and on.
4. Let them in on the local English Expressions
We’ve witnessed many conversations between Westerners and Japanese where certain English phrases go right over their heads!
Believe me, in Japanese English classes they don’t teach students to use “Pop to the Loo” when referencing using the restroom!
So, when dating a Japanese person make sure that you’re mindful of your date’s response (Or lack of response) to what you’re saying.
We’ve had hours and hours of conversations on different English expressions that don’t make it to the Oxford English dictionary.
Quoting a passing conversation – highlighting English expressions in red:
Me: “I totally left it to his discretion, I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt.”
Japanese Guy: “..Yes, hmm it’s a benefit?”
Me: “Right? because at the end of the day it’s not as if it’d cross their mind”
Japanese Guy: “Cross their mind? They are cross with you?”
Me: “Hmm Cross? Angry? no…. Oh “Cross their mind” is an English expression”
Japanese Guy “Ehhh really?”
Simple expressions that we take for granted have hours of conversation packed inside. Read More...
