How to warn people that you're bringing your mate who's a prick
It can be difficult to tell friends that you are bringing a plus-one who is a knob, so here are some gentle ways to prepare them for the experience:
‘He’s a bit of a character’
This playful euphemism makes your twat mate sound like a storybook villain who wears too many hats rather than someone who casually insults barmaids. Present him as a unique experience so everyone can enjoy his foul rants as a quirky and creative usage of language.
‘He tells it like it is’
Honesty is a virtue. Repeating whatever bollocks you’ve read on right-wing Facebook is not, but suggesting he’s just saying what everyone else is really thinking reframes his rudeness as radical openness. No one can hate a prophet of the people.
‘He’s a Marmite person’
Love him or hate him – it can swing both ways. Theoretically. So far everyone’s swung directly to loathing, but who knows how it’ll go this time? For some reason he just rubs people up the wrong way with the words he says and the arsehole things he does.
‘He has a dark sense of humour’
Sure, some might think his quips are offensive, mean, homophobic and misogynist, but that’s because he’s mining a sophisticated seam of ironic humour that mere Friends-watching innocents can’t comprehend. A lengthy discussion about the boundaries of comedy might distract from what he’s saying for a few moments. Read More…