Ways to Deliver Your Baby Even Though Everyone Is Looking at You
Bringing a new life into the world is an awe-inspiring experience, but the prospect of delivering a baby while being observed can be overwhelming. Fear not, dear mother! Here are five valuable suggestions on how to successfully give birth, even when all eyes are upon you.
Communicate your shyness.
Communicating your shyness is crucial, as it is challenging enough to perform simple tasks when feeling self-conscious, let alone giving birth. It's perfectly normal to experience performance anxiety, and honesty is the best policy. Inform those around you that you are shy, and they may demonstrate consideration by turning away during the miraculous moment of your baby's arrival.
Return their gaze.
Staring is impolite, especially when you find yourself in a vulnerable state, naked and in the process of bringing forth a future leader. If your audience persists in their stares, meet their gaze with defiance. Convey through your eyes that you won't tolerate their intrusion without a fight. Turn the tables on them and question why they are not the ones experiencing the extraordinary act of childbirth. With any luck, this will help them realize that they cannot expect women to endure the labor of birthing while they gawk without consequence.
Don a pair of sunglasses.
By wearing sunglasses with dark-tinted lenses, you can shield yourself from prying eyes. The darker the shades, the greater the likelihood of blocking out any onlookers. Incorporating dark sunglasses into your birth plan can provide a soothing element. Moreover, you will exude a sense of coolness while delivering your baby.
Redirect attention from your active labor.
Devise a plan to divert attention away from your labor. One effective method is the "murder mystery" distraction. Inform everyone that there is a murderer in the room and that you have been entrusted with the task of investigating the crime. While transforming the hospital room into a murder mystery set may seem whimsical, everyone will be too preoccupied with proving their innocence to notice the arrival of your beautiful 10-pound bundle of joy. Once your child is born, you can playfully reveal, "Just kidding, it was all a ruse!" The relief that there isn't a murderer amongst them will overshadow any mess you may have made on the floor.
Make a swift escape.
Remember, you are not obligated to give birth while being scrutinized by all and sundry. The birthing experience is profoundly personal, and you should be in control. If you manage to swiftly depart the hospital room, you can make your exit without anyone catching up to you. Pro tip: Running can actually expedite labor! In no time, you will have a private and speedy birth—just be mindful of any traces of birth fluids you may leave behind.
Regardless of whether this is your first or third child, every individual deserves a comfortable birthing experience, free from the prying gazes of ignorant onlookers. Don't allow the presence of spectators to intimidate you into keeping your baby within you—when it's time to deliver, it's time to deliver. Happy birthing!