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Why I Want Kids so I Have Someone to Pass My Debt on to When I Die

Ah, the joys of parenthood! The sleepless nights, the endless diaper changes, and the constant chorus of “Are we there yet?” While some people want kids to carry on the family name or to fill their homes with laughter, my motives are a bit more... strategic. I want kids so I have someone to pass my debt on to when I die. Yes, you heard that right. Let me explain why this is a brilliant plan.

First off, let's talk about the numbers. Have you seen the cost of living these days? Raising kids is expensive, but think of it as a long-term investment. Sure, I might be shelling out thousands on education, food, and extracurricular activities now, but in the end, they get the honor of inheriting my finely curated collection of debts. College loans, mortgage payments, credit card balances – it’s the gift that keeps on giving.

Imagine the life lessons my kids will learn. Nothing builds character quite like being thrust into financial turmoil. By inheriting my debt, they’ll learn valuable skills such as budgeting, negotiating with creditors, and the importance of fiscal responsibility. It’s a crash course in adulthood that no Ivy League school can match.

Family time is important, and what better way to keep the family united than a shared financial crisis? My kids and their kids can gather around the table and discuss strategies to manage the debt, creating bonds stronger than any board game night could. It's the ultimate teamwork exercise.

Some people leave behind estates and inheritances, but those are fleeting and easily squandered. Debt, on the other hand, is a constant reminder of my presence. Long after I’m gone, my children will remember me every time they write a check to pay off another portion of the debt I so lovingly left them. It’s a way of ensuring I’m never forgotten.

Who needs a plaque or a statue when you can leave a legacy etched in financial records? My name will be immortalized in the ledgers of various financial institutions. Generations of bankers will whisper my name in awe as they recount the epic saga of my debt. It’s not just about leaving a mark; it’s about making history.

So, while some might dream of spoiling their grandkids with trust funds and heirlooms, I’m content with the knowledge that my legacy will live on through the relentless pursuit of debt repayment. It’s a plan that’s both foolproof and heartwarming in its own unique way. After all, nothing says “I love you” like a pile of unpaid bills.

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