You be the judge: should my boyfriend close the kitchen cupboards after himself?
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Loading... - Abraham Fernandes
- 24 Jun 2022
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Donald, my boyfriend of three years, permanently leaves the kitchen cupboards open. I’ll come home from work and the cutlery drawer will be out, the cupboard where we keep the teabags ajar, and the condiments cupboard wide open. It’s a hazard. And aesthetically it makes everything look terrible.
I’m only 5ft and the open doors are just the right height to hit my head. I also bang my hips on the drawers. It hurts and could be avoided if Donald just closed them. I’m a bit of a klutz and his habit makes it worse.
He says it’s my fault if I walk into things and that I should keep my eyes peeled. But if I’m just back from work and rushing around in the kitchen or trying to make a cup of tea, I don’t always see them.
Before we moved in together two years ago, Donald lived with housemates. He says that no one ever called him out on it. I think that’s probably because he was always able to blame someone else, but now it’s just the two of us there’s no escape.
I noticed his little quirk as soon as we moved in together. The first few times I thought it was me being forgetful but with Donald working from home in lockdown it became obvious who it was. My parents also commented on it when we stayed at their house. They said: “Oh, we can see Donald has been here.”
It’s weird. He doesn’t leave wardrobe doors open or the toilet seat up. It’s just in the kitchen
I’ve asked him why he leaves all these doors open. He says that he forgets, and he’s going to open the cupboards again 10 minutes later, so why bother closing them. That makes some sense. He makes a lot of tea and gets up regularly – but he should still take more care so I don’t have to close everything.
It’s weird. He doesn’t leave wardrobe doors open or the toilet seat up and is also tidier than me in other areas – I have more clothes and leave a lot of stuff hanging around our flat. It’s just in the kitchen.
Donald should try harder. It’s an easy win in our relationship. If he can’t manage it, maybe we should get child locks. Or, Donald should keep the tea and coffee on the counter so he won’t have to open that drawer.
The defence: Donald
I drink a lot of tea and coffee, so I like to keep the cupboard door permanently open
I see no issue with leaving kitchen cupboards open. I work from home and get up every 90 minutes to make a cuppa. On an average day I drink three cups of tea, two coffees and (after 9pm) several cups of peppermint tea. It’s more efficient to keep the teabag cupboard open all day. That’s my excuse and I think it’s a valid one.
I know it doesn’t take a lot of energy to close the doors and drawers after yourself, but I just don’t think about it when I’m in work mode. After two years of working remotely I’ve got into the habit of leaving things ajar. I can’t help it. I leave the cutlery cupboard open, as well as three cupboards containing condiments and tea and coffee.
I also spend more time in the kitchen. I’m the domestic god, while Daisy brings home more of the bacon, so the kitchen is my domain. I should be able to do what I like with it.
I don’t believe Daisy’s argument that she’s a klutz and needs help not to bump into things. Her eyesight is better than mine – I wear glasses and she doesn’t. When she’s banged her hip on a drawer I am sympathetic. I will hear a gasp or “ow!” from the kitchen and feel a bit bad. But I don’t think it’s my fault. She should watch where she’s going. If I’ve left a drawer open it’s not to spite her. It’s not my responsibility if she knocks into one. Read More...
